Clarity


I need to focus. My purpose is to get nurses healthy the same way I begged to no be addicted to the alcohol, the high of achieving, and now the comfort of another. It's fear of unknown happiness, when I am happy now. I am where I need to be. I am pursuing my purpose.

That is cause for celebration and I am so proud.

Yoga calms me because it reminds me that I am not alone, though I choose to celebrate the Universe and not some god. Their god aligns more with my purpose, but the highness of the Universe that karma and personal wealth comes from loving others and alleviating suffering however you strengths pull you. I became a nurse and now the certification and degrees with help push my alleviation further. Though yoga would teach me that the ghost within me, each atom of my soul can become the healer, I do not have the knowledge yet. I must pursue this knowledge, I must pursue this chatter in my mind, I must put to rest my fears.

Everything that would happen already is. I can not undo the past but as I have witnessed, goodness far outweighs whatever I have done before. Each seed is fear, and fear is gone. Whether I am reincarnate as thing, animal, human, or angel, it does not block my ultimate mission. I am already an angel and this is my duty. I am so grateful to know this now and not waste time searching for other seeds to fill my garden. My garden is full. But cultivation requires time, persistence, and will never end.

I am so grateful to allow the unknown fear and anxiety to wash away, you will work until your dying day and you will fill unfulfilled until your last breath. That is the nature, so be it.

Yoga and physical lessons have taught me how self-control is the future of my happiness. I have controlled myself and learning to control my mind. Physical happiness does not equate to fulfillment. Quit your worry. That your purpose is not aligned with others, your purpose shall be fulfilled and destiny will take over when you let it. Ask for what you need for your purpose, not what you want for your chatter.

Isn't it nice to know that this is done? Your purpose is fulfilled, you are simply making the effort to pass the time. This is required and also, already done. Similar to the fat lady not singing yet, but that the chorus is repeated until this life and the atoms of this body are complete. You are in the impasse of life, and the chatter will quiet only when you allow yourself to recognize the fear only hinders you from happiness.

Let it go. You are free. You are an angel to pursue your purpose and only those seeds forward shall bring you wellbeing in this life. Continue on, that is happiness.

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